Image by Sam Pink
Dear J. A.,
It was dark when you realized you needed more red wine for the tomato sauce. You decided to drive to the grocery store just down the road.
It was jumped out in front of you, whatever it was. You felt the thud and crunch even before you saw the tail flap up in the head light’s beam. The dark shape flew off into the ditch. Skidding to a halt you, consider driving on, but you can’t.
The piteous mewling sound leads you on, and low in the gloom you see something you never saw before . . .
YOUR APOSTROPHECAST INTERVIEW
This email interview will be published unedited, only the questions you choose not to answer will be deleted.
1) Has pornography gone mainstream? Are obscenity laws obsolete?
Yes and yes. Mainstream because the internet is it, right? Isn’t that where everyone goes for the porn now? Sure, you have to click on something that says ‘yes, I want to look at porn,’ but that is just bullshit lawyer ass-covering. Though if you run on a football field buck-naked you will still get a ribcage full of electricity, though I am not sure if they will cite you with obscenity.
2) What might someone who has never been to Colorado do by innocent mistake and not live to regret?
I don’t know about regrets, but:
We have a nasal ‘a’
We are not all skiers or snowboarders
We are not all cowboys
We do not live on farms
We do not have sweet tea
3) What book should someone read if they have been betrayed by a friend?
4) Have you ever gone to a party uninvited? Have you ever thrown a party and had uninvited guests?
No and no. I am not that social. Plus, no one wants to hang out with me that badly, to crash a party.
5) What is the tiredest you have ever been?
Our first son, about three months in, nothing is as tired as that (except for our second child, about three months in, which will happen in about May)
6) Is there any literary movement or time period you have absolutely no interest in?
Old school British lit. No thanks.
7) When was the last time you rode a horse? Rowed a boat? Rote memorized?
Horse? When I was about 13. Boat? When I was about 16. Rote Memorization? I am a teacher, so just this morning.
8) Do you have a favorite joke?
Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.
9) Have you ever been injured playing a sport?
Nope. Though I did crack my head open on a fireplace once. I was jumping in a sleeping bag. That isn’t a sport.
10) Which writers frighten you?
Blake Butler for his level of output.
Peter Markus for his willingness to repeat and chant and pray in lit.
Tao Lin for his army of interns.
James Chapman for his unbelievable ability to write.
Michael Martone and Brian Evenson both for their quality of writing and their level of good-heartedness.
Thanks,
GBB
Listen, Listen, Listen . . . to Apostrophe Cast, episode 55 featuring J.A. Tyler reading from his new novella A MAN OF GLASS & ALL THE WAYS WE HAVE FAILED, forthcoming 2011ish from fugue state press.
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